Monday, May 07, 2007
Mulling Over Mother's Day...
Dum dum dee dee.. Dum dum dee dee..
Recommendation #1: Never take a walk at the mall if you know an occasion's around the corner. It can be potentially depressing.
Recommendation #2: If you have to take a walk, DO NOT enter Metro.
*sighz* Since the last outburst I have not been able to speak to my mom. And I've only seen her once. I hear her everyday through a wooden door where she coops herself in her room watching her TV serials. The last outburst was more than a month ago. It was an ugly scene. I have a dented doorknob to prove my point. Since then I come home to a dark and lightless house every night. I had wondered at one point how long I was going to live like that. That thought is lurking somewhere deep in the recesses of my mind. They come back to haunt me along with other disturbing thoughts from time to time. But I digress.
So Mother's Day this time around isn't exactly a joyous occasion. It's an awkward one. I'm plucking up the courage to ask my auntie (sorta my godmother) along to enjoy a meal together at some eating place. Some day I choose as a reason for reconciliation huh. It's not that I don't wish to have anything to do with my mom. Things just happened to cause this rift and now I don't know what to expect with this step I'm going to take (if I take it). There's fear of rejection, retaliation, manipulation, you name it, it's all there. A thousand things could happen man. And I don't know if I'm ready to handle it. And one thing's for sure, it definitely is not going to be an silent night where all's bright and calm.
I think I'll get her a gift and a note and write a few heartfelt words and invite her to respond by sitting for a meal together with my aunt as well. That seems wiser aye?
Mantou at 9:45 PM